Why I Want It

Other gloriously useless things you definitely need:

Wrong Answer Exam Book

Blue exam book titled F in Exams showing a handwritten geometry problem on the cover.

Finally, a way to prove you’re the smartest person in the room by being the most confidently incorrect. F in Exams features the very best totally wrong test answers, making it the ultimate trophy for anyone who has mastered the art of failing with style.

$6ishWANT IT

Gallows Humor Book

Gallows Humor Book

Finally, a way to admit you’re done with everyone without actually having to say it out loud. All My Friends Are Dead is a satirical hardcover packed with puns and comic strips for the socially exhausted who are tired of pretending they still have a social life.

$7ishWANT IT

The Worst Alphabet Book

Hardcover children's book cover featuring a pink pterodactyl and the title P Is for Pterodactyl.

P Is for Pterodactyl: The Worst Alphabet Book Ever is exactly what it claims to be. Featuring Czards and Tsunami, this raucous trip through the alphabet’s weirdest corners is the perfect way to ruin your child’s education with high-quality, oddly specific nonsense that only an unhinged parent would love.

$7ishWANT IT

Traumatize Your Children Book

Humorous parenting book cover featuring a cartoon child and the title How to Traumatize Your Children.

Secure your legacy as a parental disaster with the "How to Traumatize Your Children" book. This witty guide offers seven proven methods to screw up your kids with skill and humor, making it the perfect gift for parents who want to be their wittiest, most chaotic selves.

$8ishWANT IT

Ex-Wife's Wedding Dress Book

Hardcover blue book featuring a person in a white wedding dress on a rustic wooden surface.

101 Uses for My Ex-Wife's Wedding Dress is the petty masterpiece your bookshelf is missing. This hilarious guide turns matrimonial wreckage into practical household items, making it the perfect gift for anyone who wants to handle a messy breakup with maximum creative spite.

Fifty Shades of Chicken

Hardcover cookbook cover showing a perfectly roasted golden chicken on a white plate.

Spice up your kitchen with the delicious, feathered deviance of Fifty Shades of Chicken. This parody cookbook swaps spicy romance for "Mustard-Spanked Chicken" and "Dripping Thighs," making it the perfect gag gift for anyone who wants their poultry prep to be slightly more scandalous.

$10ishWANT IT

Baking Bad Parody Cookbook

Green parody cookbook cover featuring a cupcake with blue frosting and dramatic smoke.

Give your favorite chemistry-obsessed home baker the ultimate gift with the Baking Bad parody cookbook. It’s the perfect way to cook up some "product" while keeping the neighbors from calling the authorities on your kitchen's suspiciously delicious activity, all while staying strictly within the legal limits of pastry.

$20ishWANT IT

Middle Class Problems Book

Humorous book cover titled Middle Class Problems showing a man in a yellow shirt holding his head.

Finally, a book that validates your existential dread about owning a lawnmower and a slightly too expensive toaster. Middle Class Problems by Benjamin Lee turns the soul-crushing absurdity of modern life into a hilarious comedy, making it the perfect gift for anyone currently drowning in suburban mediocrity.

$142ishWANT IT

Spare Time Money Book

Bright orange book cover showing a shadowy figure and the title "How to Make Money in Your Spare Time.

When your friend complains about their 9-to-5 again, hand them "How to Make Money in Your Spare Time." This satirical guide offers hilarious, useless side hustle ideas for anyone who wants to turn their leisure time into a fortune without actually trying.

$9ishWANT IT

Idiots Are Everywhere Book

Hand holding bread near a book cover featuring a humorous wildlife warning sign in a grassy setting.

Idiots Are Everywhere is the literary validation you need for every time you’ve rolled your eyes at a stranger today. This 136-page humor book captures the absurdity of human incompetence in pure, relatable spite, making it the perfect gift for your most judgmental friend.

Crap Taxidermy Book

Hardcover Crap Taxidermy book with a humorous illustration of a fox standing on a wooden stand.

Your coffee table deserves the chaotic energy of Crap Taxidermy, a book dedicated to the glorious failures of preservation. From "Dieting Foxes" to "Tabby Gymnastics," these cursed images prove that sometimes, the only thing better than a preserved animal is a really messed-up one.

$9ishWANT IT

The Hungover Cookbook

Bright mustard yellow cookbook cover titled The Hungover Cookbook with a small illustration.

When your head feels like a construction site and your stomach is staging a protest, The Hungover Cookbook is your only friend. This hilarious guide offers the perfect culinary roadmap for navigating the morning after without making your internal organs regret your questionable life choices.