Why I Want It

Other gloriously useless things you definitely need:

Waterproof Pool Table

White outdoor pool table with waterproof felt resting on a tiled patio in a garden setting.

There is a pool table designed to survive a literal rainstorm. The Hathaway Alpine features waterproof, UV-resistant felt and a powder-coated aluminum frame, ensuring your break shots remain flawless even when the clouds open up—it’s the ultimate "why does this exist" backyard flex.

$2249ishWANT IT

Transforming Picnic Table

Natural wood picnic table and bench set, designed to transform for outdoor dining.

This picnic table is having a serious identity crisis, and honestly, we’re here for it. It smoothly transforms from a full dining setup into a garden bench, allowing you to host a backyard feast and then immediately pretend you don't have a table once the guests leave.

$177ishWANT IT

Harry Potter Chess Set

Movie replica Harry Potter chess set featuring detailed wizard pieces on a black and white board.

Behold the Harry Potter Final Challenge Chess Set, a massive, movie-accurate replica that weighs more than your actual problems. With 32 detailed pieces and a striking 20-inch board, it transforms a simple game into a high-stakes wizarding duel that demands your full, magical attention.

$44ishWANT IT

Inflatable Jousting Logs

A smiling boy in a swimming pool interacting with large inflatable jousting logs.

Turn your backyard pool into a medieval battlefield with these Inflatable Jousting Logs. Balance on vinyl logs and swing boppers to knock your friends into the deep end, settling petty grievances with a high-energy, splashy showdown of oddly specific, water-based violence.

$26ishWANT IT

Ray Gun UFO Pool Float

Two kids floating on purple UFO pool floats with water squirters in a backyard pool.

The UFO Pool Float with Ray Gun is the only way to properly defend your backyard from aquatic invaders. These retro-styled crafts draw water directly from the pool for a constant stream of chaos, ensuring your neighbors will definitely think you’re starting an intergalactic uprising.

$52ishWANT IT

Reclining Pool Lounger

Bright blue inflatable pool lounger with an adjustable backrest floating in a clear swimming pool.

Why settle for a basic floatie when you can have a fully reclining pool couch for two? This oversized inflatable lounger features an adjustable backrest and dual cupholders, perfect for those who refuse to compromise on lumbar support while drifting aimlessly in the deep end.

$81ishWANT IT

Monopoly Cheaters Edition

Monopoly Cheaters Edition board game spread out on a wooden table with tokens and plastic handcuffs.

Monopoly Cheaters Edition is the only board game that rewards your worst impulses while physically punishing your friends. It features a plastic handcuff unit to chain rule-breakers to the Jail space, turning your next game night into a hilarious, low-stakes felony where the only rule is that there are no rules.

$16ishWANT IT

Star Wars Saga Monopoly

Star Wars Saga Edition Monopoly board game featuring classic characters like Luke and Vader.

The Star Wars Saga Edition Monopoly allows you to experience the crushing weight of capitalism through the lens of a galaxy far, far away. Trade settlements like a Sith Lord and use the Force to bankrupt your friends while navigating a board game that is unnecessarily, beautifully extra.

$89ishWANT IT

Total Rickall Card Game

Rick and Morty Total Rickall cooperative card game box with colorful character artwork.

Save the world from interdimensional parasites without the stress of a table captain ruining your vibe. The Rick and Morty Total Rickall Cooperative Card Game lets you root out hidden roles and zany characters, making it the perfect way to ruin your friends' sanity in the name of science.

$12ishWANT IT

Cypress Tree Coffee Table

Modern living room coffee table featuring a dark, intricate tree root base and clear glass top.

Your living room is currently lacking the chaotic energy of a literal forest. This Cypress Tree Coffee Table provides that exact vibe, offering a nature-inspired centerpiece that makes your guests wonder if you’ve finally lost it or just have impeccable taste.

$1430ishWANT IT

Aquarium End Table

Clear glass end table housing a vibrant illuminated aquarium with blue gravel and fish.

Your living room is officially lacking a tropical ecosystem, but this illuminated aquarium end table fixes that. It features a 25-gallon tank with blue glass gravel and a solid tempered glass top, making it the perfect place to rest your drink while your fish live their best life.

$696ishWANT IT

Chocolate Donut Pool Float

Oversized brown donut pool float covered in colorful sprinkles floating in a blue swimming pool.

Nothing says "I’ve completely lost my grip on reality" like lounging in a four-foot chocolate donut. This oversized vinyl float features a convenient pre-taken bite, making you the most delicious—and least edible—person at the pool party while providing a patch kit for your inevitable mid-summer mishaps.

$16ishWANT IT